Chapter 1: The First Testament of Octibuddhus (11:56)

Octibuddhus was a special child. His parent (we believe there was only one) knew this even before he was born.
His mother Virginia (nicknamed Virgin by her many friends) was an only child, who grew up in a slightly dysfunctional family and home, consisting of a mother who worked on corners, and a father who was never around. As she grew up she went to several different schools (all in barns) that were awful and at the age of 17 she met a man, who looked very much like a hobo. He had a long hairy beard and wore a multi-coloured coat. He went by the name of Joseph and they became lovers.
One day Virginia had an exceedingly strange evening, which not only involved several pints of Carlsberg Export but also led to the start of a new life. Stumbling home in the morning, Joseph asked her “Where have you been? I’ve been worried sick.” Of course Virginia was completely delirious and told Joseph a very imaginative excuse.
“Oh, well….”She said. “I saw a bright light and some gleaming person in the sky told me I was with child, a special child.”
“You mean to say you’ve been out all night making love to ANOTHER man?” Joseph shouted furiously.
“It is God’s child.” Virginia lied cautiously.
“You should have said.” Joseph replied. He was now very relieved, but how bloody thick was this Joseph bloke?
Anyway we are led to believe this was God’s child, and so tells this story in the following chapters….